Tug Dumbly | Pod
We came up the dune and saw them, way down on the surfline,
these dark specks all along the beach.
Birds fell to them like dandruff, and more birds were coming in
from behind us on the dune top, crying through the metal sky –
Gulls, Skewers, Shags, like fighter planes to some Dunkirk scene.
And not just seabirds but Crows and Ravens too, Corvids drawn
from miles to this peninsula, with its pubic Mohawk of scrub.
We skidded down the dune and the gritted wind hit our legs.
It was no joke, this Summer.
We just wanted to get the Pippies and get out quick.
'Cargo spill', someone says.
But up close we saw they were coffins, hundreds of them,
thousands maybe, going forever down the blade of beach,
melting into the brinehaze of the coming storm.
Some were beached high and others rocked rough in the foam,
knocking like trawlers on a schizo swell. They were mostly adult,
but there were child ones too, and baby ones in pink and blue.
We tried pushing a couple back out to sea, but were fighting
an onshore Easterly and turning tide.
Kelp wrapped our legs and tripped us, waves smashed into us,
soaking us straight to frozen bone.
If you battled a box through the breakers it just got punched back in.
It was hopeless. And they had no will left to fight.
‘Lookout!’ someone yells
and this big dumper chunders in and skittles us, rolls us under like rags.
The wave takes the coffin we’re steering and spits it high.
It comes down hard, like a caber, on the shingle, and splits and spills
its guts – little foam balls, hundreds of them, an Esky lid, a bong,
water pistol, condom, bait packets, tumbleweeds of fishing line,
bottles, pallet banding, thong … plastic shit of all kinds.
Dead fish too, and a couple of gulls, one with a rusty hook
through its rotten black skull.
And masks –
yeah, dozens of slimy green facemasks …
all this stuff spewing from the coffin, and from other boxes too,
washing up in a necklace of trash all down the shore.
We forgot the bait. Just got back up the dune to the car.
We never talked on the drive, but knew we weren’t going to
say nothing. Not today. We stopped at the store to get some rum
and tried to be quick. But Tilly Mack was up a ladder outside his shop.
He called us over, the jolly fat fuck.
‘Weh-hell! You fellas bin havin’ a time of it! What’s the go?’
The red pan of his face looked down at us, soaked and shivering like rats.
‘Just gettin’ some bait, Tilly’.
He was stapling up bunting and its little flags snapped in the wind.
Other shops were decked with streamers and balloons.
The street stalls were getting set, and we could hear the town band
farting away behind the Progress Hall. The parade started in an hour
and we didn’t want to spoil anyone’s fun, not today.
You’re closing down like a shop in the bad part of town
where nobody passes by, and nothing’s available anymore
on a list long as the night. You dream about the layers that still protect
your failing heart, like guards that won’t be told their king is dying.
Epicardium, myocardium, endocardium. You dream the full weight of the organ
lost in the backyard amidst the spearmint-coloured grass, then suddenly
inside, on your dining room table. And you think of the Sunday roasts
your mother used to make, hands around the raw and bloody meat, rubbing in
garlic and herbs. And of your father up against the shed, hand across his chest
not to swear or pledge, but to quiet down the galloping fear of death.
You dream of deep-sea diving, a kink in your oxygen tank, and up above the
barely visible circle of light that will lead you back. And of the octopus with its three
hearts, biding its time on the ocean floor. This physical world of ridicule and reason
hope held at arm’s length, like a scapegrace relative you admire but rarely see.
You wake up hot and gasping, the curtains move like kids in sheets, wild at your window.
When the phone rings, the world outside seems suddenly relit. But it could be just the
moon, fallen to earth on this early morning of possibility, where the atmosphere seems thicker, and the somatic landscape will steady as you dress. They have your heart
it’s in a box, reanimated and active now with donor’s blood. Its own nervous system
forty thousand buzzing neurons. You’re frightened of it, little imposter playing dress
up. But you long for it too, and on the drive in your wife stares straight ahead, her
hands gripping and ungripping the steering wheel. At red lights she glances your
way. She’s scared you’ll wake up loving someone else. You’ve waited five
years. This heart will wait for fourteen hours. You’ve played it out a thousand
times. The opening of the rib cage, bones moving away like roads on a map to
different towns. Your body preparing to broadcast the beat. The old heart
agreeing to leave. The new one a lottery. Foreign. Rich as a stew. Anonymous
valentine lying in wait for the tinman. You move slowly toward it now, your wife
sticks to back roads, slowing so much at every bend you almost stop.
At hospital, before you lie down, they show it to you. You remember reading in
the Guinness World Records, that a transplanted heart has survived for thirty-five
years inside a man in Ontario. And now, as sleep comes, you wonder about
the donor. About cellular memory. Will you wake up knowing how he died? Or if he
had a sister, will you open your mouth to let her name out? Or find yourself craving
a food you’ve never liked? The sudden ending to a book you’ve never read?
The surgeon stands over you, modern day Frankenstein, trying to get the monster right.
You dream the heart’s electromagnetic field, of all the ambulances you’ve ever
ridden in, side by side in a darkened lot. Jacked up. Waiting for parts. You dream this very
morning as you leave the house behind in the rear-vision mirror. The donor’s sister
standing at the end of the driveway by the wattle tree. Her hands are cupped around
her mouth as she calls after you. She’s saying that she hopes you get the tenderness.
All the tenderness that was suddenly stopped. She’s calling, then waving, then gone. And then you’re alone. Right atrium, left atrium. Right ventricle, left ventricle. Flooding the body
with life.
Lucy Williams | Heart in a box
Jenny Gu | Verisimilitude
because i want to preserve myself as someone else – happy
because i want to preserve myself as anything but this.
they say that no two people are exactly the same and yet
we all have the hobby of playing pretend.
playing in our smokescreen eternities, lost in the flickering
ashes that sputters and sparks and vanishes from the tip
of a freshly snuffed cigarette, and triumphant, we grasp
at the embers and laugh when our fingers emerge bloody;
singed, but it is only a game. a game where we rip away parts
of each other, tearing away scarred flesh from bone, until we are
nothing more than patchwork souls with stitched up hearts
that beat futilely in our chests. they mirror me and
i reflect what i see in them and who are we but two
crude mockeries of perfection, trying to paint ourselves until
we shine, bright enough for glory, bright enough for you?
( go on, feral creature.
won’t you go look into that mirror again and smile at this victory of yours?
do not preserve yourself as you were, a monstrosity clawing at every crooked
imperfection that stained your skin. preserve yourself as you are – happy. )
and so we become one of the many flawed players indulging in
the flawless destruction of ourselves, trading our little, vain realities
for truer pretences. porcelain in our bones, metal in our skin,
blood in our mouths – but it already hurts a little less
( go on.
this is what you wanted isn’t it?
preserve yourself as you are, beautiful and untouched.
preserve yourself as anything but this. )
analysis
What was the subject of and the inspiration for your poem and why? Make close reference to the poem.
My poem is about a persona who wants to be someone else and metaphorically takes apart themself and imitates
others, trying to be the person that they wish they were and burying the person they were born as, but they can
never reach the ideal. I was inspired by the fact that everyone wants, or has wanted to change something about
themselves at one point of their lives. The cause of the persona’s self hatred is never explained and left up to the
reader’s imagination so that they can relate to it more.
The general theme of this poem is society’s role in identity, or the lack of thereof. There are two main motifs in
this poem that make up the theme, the first one being the eventual loss of self identity as the persona
metaphorically becomes a ‘ghost’. In the phrase ‘ashes that sputters and sparks and vanishes’, ashes symbolise the
persona’s former self and when they vanish, it symbolises that the persona has succeeded in removing the person
that they once were. This idea is carried on in phrases such as ‘we rip away parts of each other’, where the word
choice of rip could also mean rest in piece to their former self (a form of dark humour and wordplay, both of
which are prevalent in postmodernist poetry). As well as this, the word choice of ‘we’ means that a lot of people
are like this.
The second motif is how the persona can never reach the ideal standard of a person. This is seen in phrases such
as ‘a crude mockery of perfection’, showing how they’re still not ‘up to standard’ and in ‘bright enough for you’,
you represents society, showing how we all want to achieve perfection but how we can never get there. There is
another voice in brackets that calls them a ‘divine creature’ shortly after this. This voice represents society, who
doesn’t refer to them as a person but rather a creature, which is a term frequently used to convey scorn or pity.
They mock the fact that the persona’s goal at the start of the poem was to be happy, hence showing the readers
that the persona is not. The phrases ‘porcelain in our bones, metal in our skin, blood in our mouths’ are
juxtaposed with ‘but it already hurts a little less’. Anyone can tell that having either of the three are not
particularly nice but the persona treats it like a gift – the fact that it makes them beautiful somehow ‘lessens’ the
pain. The poem ends with the juxtaposed phrases of ‘preserve yourself as you are’ and ‘preserve yourself as
anything but this’, showing how there will always be a changing ideal in society, and no matter what you do to
change yourself for it, you will never reach that ideal.
What style/genre did you choose to write in and why?
I chose to write in post-modernism free verse because it gave me the most freedom and allowed me to play with
structure. I embodied this in forms of distorted time, fragmented structure and wordplay.
Select 2-3 poetic techniques typical of your style/genre you created and explain how they work to convey your ideas.
A caesura is used at the start of the poem to place emphasis on the fact that the lines were not formatted in a
fragmented fashion, showing the sanity that the persona had before and breaks the flow of the text, making the
reader think about the change. It is also used at the end, highlighting the futility of the persona’s actions.
Another technique that features prominently in my poem is irony, such as in the title itself. The title,
verisimilitude means the appearance of being true or real, which is ironic because the whole poem is about the
imitation and becoming make believe. Another example is in ‘preserve myself’ at the beginning of the poem,
which is ironic because by changing themselves into someone else, they are no longer preserving 'themselves' but
rather fragments of everyone – none of those fragments being themselves.
Eartha Davies| Entanglement
Ayushi Jain | He's Dead PS I'm Grieving
In the loving memory of my grandad
This world can be a gloomy place sometimes
Sometimes? I’m lying.
It doesn’t make sense when you want it to
But when it does
It’s too
diabolical
to witness.
When I have had enough of this realm
Quite too often
perhaps
I disappear.
Don’t let them find out
where I am,
I am at Khyati’s house
And appear in my babaji’s locked 2 bedroom apartment
It’s locked because it’s up for sale
Dad said,
It won’t fetch much
but there’s no use in
Letting it be vacant
either
I can’t imagine someone else living there.
Those white walls and that murky floor
They mean everything.
They mean nothing,
I don’t miss him
I am not fragile,
I don’t long for his
benignity again
It’s the quarters where he died
I try not to focus on that part,
So I divert to the memories I have cosseted.
I don’t have any memories
I don’t even remember what he looked like
On an eroded shelf just there above
his irreplaceable cathode-ray television
Would be a wooden carton of mangoes
Or a cardboard box of cherries.
No I am not reminded of him
Every single time I sit down to eat
Bringing new stories he heard from strangers
He was a man of the world, a traveler.
Dad do you remember that
story babaji told about that ring merchant?
No I didn’t ask dad that.
Babaji’s dead, we don’t miss
him.
Domestic and unpopular villages, abandoned libraries
Those were more his tea
Why do I still remember his morning yoga routines?
Just two cloves of adrak, no sugar
Saturate it with honey until the
fragrance of the tea leaves
is rendered null and void
Always and always shall I profess
To be emotion-less and devoid of anything that makes me human
But inside I am burned and full of soot
A
his ashes
tornado
within.
Ayushi Jain | Gone
In the loving memory of a lost childhood
Soft toys wrapped in a black cloth
Stashed in the attic, forgotten, lost.
Or thrown away in the bin
Or left behind at the last place we declared home.
Doltish haircuts and vacuous glasses
Wide eyed and open mouthed glances at the sky
at the sound of an airplane
And whispered cursing, giggling
And good-night kisses.
A thousand flamboyant hair clips
Two thousand plastic necklaces
Three thousand loose teeth
Four thousand pirouetting aampanna glasses
Five thousand miles away, absent.
Toy cars and montessori blocks
Nani’s fragile hands knitting woolen sweaters
in the noon of a hypothermic winter
Bulbous cheeks
Tumefied tonsils
Birthday cakes and gaugeable candles
Lurking outside after dark
Unaware of some predator’s eyes.
Forgotten blood vows
Broken swings
Bruised knees and bleeding ankles and cut fingers
Dead “Best friends for life”
Dead “I’ll marry you when I get a little older”
Somewhere in the stars
Long gone jubilant innocent girls and ponytails
Dead stray kittens, trampled street dogs
Rotting mangoes and cherries
Decomposing into the ground, gone.
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